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Wednesday, January 16, 2013

THE DOWNLOAD HORROR REVIEW


Summary:

When it comes to movies Dougie and Robbo know what they like. And there is nothing they like more than a night in watching one of Big Al’s latest downloads - especially if it’s a horror film featuring five babes alone in a big house.

Big Al is the neighborhood bootlegger and they depend on him for a constant diet of blood, gore and nudity and whatever else he thinks will satisfy their craving. They always expect surprises.

Will his latest offering, the horror film Sacrificed, live up to their expectations?

  “The Download Horror” is a recent version of the show ‘Mystery Science Theater 3000.’ For those that aren’t familiar with that show, basically a guy and his two robot companions would sit in a theater and comment, criticize, and make fun of a movie. So with this review of “The Download Horror,” I’ll basically be reviewing the movie that Dougie and Robbo are watching, and how well the guys did as film critics.
  The film they are watching is called “Sacrificed.” It’s definitely an unusual film, as it follows a woman who’s somewhat normal at first, but turns out to be a complete nut job. The audience sees her get involved in some kind of cult activity, lures some friends to a house, and eventually kills them off. The death scenes actually don’t turn out to be too bad, and there is plenty of blood.
  Added to an already strange story, are two more weird elements. The first element is the random dreams the woman has. They just pop up out of nowhere, and I never really found any meaning from them besides adding to her craziness. The other element is a surprise appearance by a zombie. Yes, the movie isn’t about zombies, but one shows up out of nowhere. Then there is a kung fu type fight between the woman, and the zombie that’s very interesting to say the least.
  I’m not sure I caught everything that goes on in the film because I was paying attention to the conversation between Dougie and Robbo. So lets talk about that commentary. Let me start off by being honest, and say I couldn’t understand everything they said because of their accent. I’m sure there are more fun things said than I could make out.
  What I did pick up is actually pretty entertaining though. Since there are a lot of women in the movie, you can imagine that there are plenty of moments where guys are being guys. In one of the funniest scenes, they actually stop the film, rewind it, and pause it in order to check out one of the woman. There are many other sexual orientated jokes as well. They also feel free to make fun of the characters, which is really easy at times.
  Put everything together, and “The Download Horror” does enough to keep your attention. You just might become intrigued with the strangeness of “Sacrificed.” If not, you might be entertained by the funny commentary of Dougie and Robbo. Of course, if you are looking for horror, there should be just enough bloody moments for you. I enjoyed ‘Mystery Science Theater 3000,’ and I enjoyed this movie enough to give it 2 pools of blood.

  HorrO

***You can watch “The Download Horror” today at: http://www.newmediafilms.co.uk/the-download-horror/

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