My Thoughts on True Blood Season 5 Episode 1

  Naked people. Blood splattering. Rock Band. Wise remarks. “Fuck” being said about 20-30 times. Ok, maybe not Rockband, but that all must mean True Blood is back! The wait is over and the vampires have returned for another wild ride. Like the past two seasons, HorrO is back with my thoughts on each episode. This year I'm going try to keep this more to my thoughts and less on plots details. I'm assuming you've seen the episode, if not, take this as your spoiler alert! It's been a long wait so let me begin with my thoughts on episode 1, “Turn! Turn! Turn!”

  Let me start off with where they ended the season last year, Tara getting shot. Now we know why they did the maker’s day promotion, and why the episode is called “Turn! Turn! Turn!” It was all about Tara becoming a vampire. Obviously they didn’t kill her off, which is why I didn’t think it was that shocking of a season finale last year. I do have to say I’m excited that she is finally a vampire because I’ve always thought she would make an excellent one. Too bad Franklin isn’t by her side. That would be extreme craziness!

  I guess what was more shocking about the whole thing was that it was Pam that turned her. Not only that, but Pam helped out Sookie. Yes, there is a favor involved, one that Sookie will regret, but still. What was with the whole burying thing? Someone please clue me in on why them being buried together helped her become a vampire. As always, I give you my favorite line of the night, and this scene produce it. It was when Pam said, “I’m wearing a Walmart sweat suit for yall. If that isn’t a demonstration of team spirit, I don’t know what is!” Oh Pam, so funny with or without dirt in her bra.

  Moving onto to the tag team of Marcellus and Ike. No, I don’t like those names either, back to Bill and Eric. It was hilarious how they started off the episode showing Eric cleaning up Nan guts in speed mode. Figures they would start with a little humor. I also like that they showed what was happening to the tag team while Deb confronted Sookie. Poor Bill just couldn’t help himself, and had to run outside. What was surprising about the pair is how loyal Eric has become to Bill. Eric wasn’t going to leave Bill after blowing up the trunk.

  With a new season come new characters. Now introducing Eric’s sister, Nora. Definitely wasn’t expecting that. Then again, I wasn’t expecting him to have sex like a champion with his sister shortly after reuniting! A new season can also bring back characters of the past like the Reverend. I thought he was going to have some evil plan in mind, but all he wanted was Jason’s love. Yes, he is a proud gay American vampire. How come I’m not surprised True Blood would introduce such a character? It was interesting hearing a gay American vampire swear to God. Glad to see Red Riding Hood come back to Jason’s rescue. Speaking of Jessica, since when does she hang out with the college crowd? Do they eventually make a good meal?

  Let me take a break from the vampires, and talk about the wolves, and shifters. Sam made a nice escape once, but couldn’t do it twice. His ass was taken by Marcus’ pack to be tortured. We have seen different sides of Sam, but it was good to see his loyal, and honorable side. It wasn’t good to see Marcus’ mother Martha. What a messed up wolf ritual she performed! Eating the guts of your son, yuck! The good news is that hopefully means no return for Marcus.

  It was also a rough start for Alcide. First Sookie refused his help. Damn you Sookie, why can’t you just give a wolf a chance? Way to go Lafayette. Stand up to the big bad wolf! I didn’t know he had it in him. Then Alcide comes to rescue Sam. Not sure he rescued him, but he made it known who killed Marcus. It doesn’t look like the wolves are going to vote for Alcide as the next packmaster.

  Now onto the somewhat normal human Bellefleur clan. No more Mr. Nice Terry! Patrick definitely has him wired. What is with this story of their squad’s homes being burned? I mean, hopefully they are going somewhere interesting with this new storyline. The storyline with the baby started off well, but kind of fizzled out. And a big congrats to Andy for finally scoring! Meeting that fairy got his juices flowing again!

  Lets see, did I miss anything important? Mentioned Tara, yes. Bill and Eric, yes. The Authority… well we didn’t get to meet their new leader yet, so pass. Jason and Jessica, yes. No, Hoyt wasn’t worth mentioning. Could have talked more about Sookie, but I’m sure I will do plenty of that as the season unfolds. What did I miss? Of course, the King will return! How could I forget about such an awesome character? They can’t bring back Franklin (yes I will never let that go), but I can’t wait to see the King back in action. I couldn’t believe they got rid of him in the first place. It will be interesting to see what he has in store for all our favorite characters.

  With all that being said, it was a good start to the season. I could have gone without seeing Sam and Andy’s asses, but you can’t have it all. This should be an interesting season now that the focus should be on this cast of characters. No introduction of wolves, witches, and werepanthers to distract us. Just some good vampire fun with some wolves and shifters on the side. It will be good to only wait a week as opposed to months, so I will catch you after next week’s episode. In the meantime, I’m going to think about whom I would want as my maker!

  HorrO