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My Thoughts on True Blood Season 5 Episode 5

  Holy insane episodes Sookie! Forget about waiting until episode 6 for the good stuff to happen. I have nothing to complain about. Not even the fact that they cut the episode short. They do that for an episode or two every season so there is nothing shocking about that. So here are my thoughts on episode 5, "Let’s Boot and Rally."
  What the hell does boot and rally mean anyway? While I look that up, I guess I’ll start with Sook and Alcide finally, and I mean FINALLY, getting it on. Well, that was until... puke! Damn Sookie, what bad timing you have. And Bill and Eric, were you going to watch? Naughty vamps!
  Thanks for answering my question. I can rest easy knowing that Pam now owns Fangtasia. Boy is she in charge. No Monopoly, Candyland, Scrabble, or killing humans. She laid into Tara good. I thought they were going to have some fun together, but there was nothing fun about that.
  On the other hand, I knew Jessica and Tara wouldn't be having any fun together. That was an interesting conversation they had though. A good inside look at how it feels to become a vampire. Apparently nothing beats feeding and fucking except maybe a good speed fight! They should definitely do more speed fighting, like once per episode.
  So look who’s interested in Terry’s storyline now. Yes, they sucked me into it. However, I can throw out the whole thing about not bringing in any new supernatural beings. The Ifrit, which doesn’t translate to mean iPhone, isn’t going to be as big as introducing the wolves, or witches, but it will definitely play a role in Terry’s life. What an awesome being too! Loved the smoke hands. Now if it can just get rid of Patrick for us!
  He-Man pjs! He-Man pjs! He-Man pjs! I can’t believe they busted out He-Man pjs! Only Jason could be so awesome! It was also awesome seeing his parents bleed out all over their cereal. Ok, sucks for them, but terrific scene. Poor Jason, as he struggles with his sex issues, which was hilarious and awkward when his mom referenced it, he is starting to piece together what vampires have done to humans all along. Looks like Jason might be returning to his “I hate vampires” phase.
  With the return of Dallas, True Blood could have had its own version of who shot J.R.: who shot the shifters? Too bad it looks like a band of stupid humans, including that fool from the Stake House, is behind it all. They won’t get by with that for long, unless Jason in his new phase joins them! I could see it happening. And Sam, get up man! We know you will be all right! Luna, well if you watch the scene carefully they messed up the editing. She gets shot in the arm, then side, and as they change up the shot, you see her take a bullet in the stomach. So does that mean she’s dead? How dare they shoot at that little wolf!
  Sometimes you just have to take a good hard look in the mirror to reevaluate where you are in life. You stand in front of it, look up, and see… holly shit, where did that mask come from? It doesn’t look like Lafayette is going to be able to get rid of that mask any time soon, and that is fine with me. He should walk around with that on for a couple of episodes. That would be fun. Hey, Jesus, I knew it would be a matter of time before we saw you again, or part of you. Who needs a body anyway? You just might want someone to help you with your mouth so that you can actually help Lafayette. Maybe Ms. Thornton can help you with that!
  So obviously my favorite line of the night did not come from Jesus. Pam always comes strong, but not this time. Sookie tried hard, and I mean hard like that whole thing about it must be Thursday, and walking through the door’s broken window. But no, I have to give it to our favorite sheriff when he realized he “fucked a fairy.” Yes, again I go with the line you don’t usually hear. When was the last time you heard someone say they slept with Tinkerbomb, or whomever Jason was referring to. People can dream about sleeping with fairies. Hey, my dreams are none of your business. Moving on…
  To vomit, continue drinking and partying, and watch horror movies. Ok, maybe not watch horror movies, but that’s what boot and rally is all about. Speaking of horror movies, that is what they made it seem like as they walked into the asylum. Love that they incorporated the whole horror thing, including Sook’s knowledge of not splitting up before going inside. You would think after all she has gone through, there aren’t too many horror movies out there that are going to scare her. Also loved the rats eating the hand, and bodies. Wow did the King have a feast, and he wasn’t even finished.
  So the fat guy runs down the hall and a fairy, wolf, or two vampires have to catch him. Who’s your money on? Of course the fairy! All right, onto more serious things. I have brought up the loyalty between Bill and Eric several times, as I just don’t think it will last. This episode might be the first in really testing that out. Bill basically called Eric out. I don’t know what has happened to Eric. The old Eric would have had a more fierce response then just telling Bill to take it back. Even though Eric might have other ideas, I still don’t think he had anything to do with the King’s release.
  Ah yes, the day I’ve been waiting for, the return of the King. I do have to say he was looking good when they dug him up. I like the Darth Maul, or guy from Insidious look! And look at who dug him up, that damn traitor woman that stands by Roman’s side. Yes, that is who I think it is. I haven’t trusted her for one second. Outside shot at it being someone we don’t know, and it being Nora is too obvious. One last thought: Alcide really needs to get his nose fixed. Sometimes he smells people coming, and other times he has no clue! If you don’t smell right, vampires watch you have sex, and you get dragged away!
  I have to give them a lot of credit for what they have done for 5 episodes. They have done an excellent job of setting up this civil war between vampires by using the usual characters. Yes, they brought in more of the Authority, but they kind of had to do that. But showing the different sides of vampires, like how it feels to become a vamp, be a maker, and even something like Jess and Tara fighting, really shows what each side is fighting for. The speech Roman gave while showing different scenes was a great idea. It emphasized what he said, and the battle at hand. What do you think, should vampires just slaughter humans, and use them as food like in Daybreakers, or should they continue to drink True Blood and play nice with humans? Well, I don’t want to be anyone’s food, but I also don’t think vampires will ever be able to play nice with humans. Food for thought, until next week!



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