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Saturday, September 19, 2009

MESSENGERS 2: THE SCARECROW REVIEW


(Possible spoilers in this review!)
The Messengers 2 is a prequel to the Messengers done in 2007. Really, I don't see why it is a prequel, it could have been a sequel all the same. In other words, it really had nothing to do with part one. Basically, both movies took place on a farm, and involved a family getting scared by something. That's about it! So if you were looking to get some more information on why the things happened in part one, forget about it.
Let's talk about the story in this movie. We have a family, consisting of a father, mother, young boy, and older sister. The father has fallen on hard times, and was having a hard time paying the bills. His crop of corn was constantly being eaten by crows, and he had no money for more seeds and to fix his irrigation system. His solution was to put up a scarecrow in his field of corn. Of course, this was not a normal scarecrow, so things quickly go wrong after this. Crows die, people die, and the father's luck changes for the better. Friction between the wife and himself grows as the father realizes something weird was going on, and it was being caused possibly by the scarecrow. Ending this long story, the scarecrow eventually battles it out with the family, and guess who wins.
So let's talk about some parts I left out and some problems I had with the movie. First, if you were expecting to see the scarecrow kill people, sorry not happening (at least not until the end). Really, the kills in this movie aren't great, and almost nonexistent (not going to win points with gory reviews that way). The scarecrow kills, or puts in motion the deaths of several people who were in the father's way of success, but you never really see them get killed. The best one was when a guy got hit by a 18-wheeler. There are a couple of scenes out in the field that were suppose to scare you, but really don't. To open the movie, a girl was being chased in the field, and was killed. Problem was, the scene was too dark so you can't enjoy the scene. Later, the father sees a little girl he earlier heard singing in the field. She tells the father "how he protects the land" (meaning the scarecrow). This little girl was suppose to be scary but really wasn't. Plus, who the hell is she? There really was no explanation of why she was there. I just assume she was a previous victim of the scarecrow. 
A few more dislikes. I didn't like how they got rid of the scarecrow (weak). There was too much fighting between the parents once the father's luck changed. Back and forth fighting all movie long. And why have a scene where he basically rapes his wife. He does this because he gets excited after watching a random woman (later to find out she was important) strip down and wet herself in the sprinklers. Just too random, leave it out since he later has sex with the woman anyway. 
I did like a couple of things. There was one character I liked in the movie, which was the neighbor. He was an older man, who introduced himself to the father early in the film. He moved back to the area where his family used to farm years ago. What I liked about him was his words (pay attention to them). They first met when the father was debating on whether or not to put up the scarecrow (only a debate because his son told him not too for another unexplained reason). He told the father to "hang your scarecrow and the rewards come later." Later he tells the father "you planted the seeds." I just like the play on words he used and how they relate to the film. Basically, if you follow everything the neighbor said, you can follow what was really going on. Too me, that was the most creative part of the film. The scarecrow was scary looking, but again hanging on the pole most of the movie scares no one. The acting wasn't terrible, so the movie was at least watchable. 
If you have seen movies like the Amityville Horror, then you really have seen this movie already (this movie was no Amityville Horror by the way). Father goes a little nuts for some reason, scares family to the point they want to leave him, but everything works out in the end. In this case, a scarecrow was involved to a point, but don't expected great things from it. One phrase used in the movie (if you followed what I said I bet you know who said it) was "you reap what you sow." This movie reaped only one interesting character, minimal killing scenes, no big twist, and some unexplained events. So in return, I give it only 1 pool of blood. 

HorrO

  

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

ZOMBIELAND REVIEW


(Apparently contains a spoiler!)
  Let me start off this review by saying I usually don't like horror/comedy movies. To me, they end up being as dumb, if not dumber, then just a plain bad horror movie. This movie is neither dumb, or just a plain bad horror movie. It is a hilarious, free spirited comedy with blood drooling zombies ripe for the killing. 
The laughs start coming right from the start as we get introduced to several rules for surviving in Zombieland by Columbus (Jesse Eisenberg). Without giving them all away and spoiling the laughs, let's just say rule #1 is CARDIO and leave it at that. The rules pop up in the background through out the movie so keep an eye open for them. The movie keeps the opening credits entertaining as we see slow motion shoots of zombies at events like a wedding, and while firefighters are putting out a fire. There is plenty of slow motion blood pouring from their mouths. 
I will admit, I thought there would be more zombie killing through out the movie than there seemed to be (or maybe it was just me). I mean, Tallahassee (Woody) was portrayed as the best zombie killer around, but you really have to wait until the end of the movie to see a mass murdering of zombies (must remember it is a comedy too). Once Columbus meets Tallahassee, we get into more of the comedy, and plot and character development than zombie killing. However, leave it to Woody to kill zombies in style when he gets his chance. While most people in zombie movies run and hide from the zombies, Woody's character Tallahassee calls the zombies out. For example, he plays a banjo to get the zombies to come running at him, and then he quickly takes them out, using the banjo of course.
The funniest part of the movie by far was when Tallahassee takes the group (Tallahassee and Columbus get paired up with two sisters) to hide at Bill Murray's house. They think it is empty, but find that Murray is there and has avoided becoming a zombie (although he has zombie make up on to blend in with the zombies). Tallahassee, Murray, and Wichita (Emma Stone as the older sister) get high and then reenact a scene from Ghostbusters. Let me tell you, I almost fell out of my chair. As mentioned before, the movie ends with Tallahassee slaughtering dozens upon dozens of zombies in bad ass style at a theme park. Imagine how fun it would be to be on a roller coaster speeding around, and getting take target practice on zombies (good times). 
This is just a fun, no rules movie with plenty of laughs, and just enough blood and killing to make it a horror film. From the survival tips to the must see Bill Murray scene, this movie is worth both your time and money. Woody was a great pick for this role, and I think audiences will love how Jesse Eisenberg and Woody play off of each other. I give this movie 4 pools of blood, which is probably more than any other horror/comedy movie I have seen.

HorrO

PS- leave your zombie kill of the week below if you got one!!!

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