THE FUNERAL HOME REVIEW

 

Bernardo is an undertaker. He runs his mortuary business in the same house where he resides. In the front he has his clients. And in the back, his dysfunctional family lives among coffins, wreaths and mischievous supernatural entities that visit on a daily basis. They attribute the paranormal manifestations to the dead bodies from their mortuary work. Find the real source of all this madness will be their quest, but they might find a terrifying truth.

Starring: Luis Machin, Celeste Gerez, and Camila Vaccarini

Directed and written by: Mauro Ivan Ojeda

  “The Funeral Home” is supposed to be for the dead, and the living are about to remember why. Bernardo (Luis Machin) has taken over the family funeral home from his father. Living with him is his wife Estela (Celeste Gerez), and her daughter Irina (Camila Vaccarini). While he works in one area of the house, the three of them live in another. Then there is the area for someone, or something else. They’re apparently sharing the home with some ghosts, and they actually signed up for it!

  That’s right, this family knows good and well that they have ghosts living in part of their home. This is quite dysfunctional, but then again so is this family. Each has an issue that effects how they feel about the others. Bernardo has guilt over how he left things with his father, and has been trying to talk with his ex-wife who is among the dead. Irina is still mourning the death of her father, and doesn’t accept Bernardo as a new dad. Estela is in the middle of their tension, and takes drugs to get through the haunting nights. If they think their problems with each other are bad, they better prepare for what’s coming.

  It’s an unusual set up that all starts with the funeral home. The audience will expect it to be creepy, and it definitely is. There’s a couple of times when the camera is just winding its way through the house taking in all of the bumps in the night. It’s dark with a smokey look, and things that appear to move by themselves. Even in the day time it looks run down, and hard to believe they’re still there.

  The house is one thing, but then there are the ghosts. The ghosts aren’t suppose to haunt the family, and that seems to be the case to start. Most are friendly and unseen, but eventually things seem to change. Now something has broken the truce with the family, and their lives are in danger. There are some good hauntings in an outdoor restroom of all places, but things don’t get really crazy until the final act. 

  A final act that has come because of the family’s disfunction. It’s what the audience sees a lot of leading up to this point, and finally a family secret comes out that shows why this evil has been unleashed. The final act starts off with some intense moments, and a good scare or two. Then it comes to a very odd ending. A fitting ending in some ways for one character, but still an unusual ending for the film.

  It’s kind of surprising that audiences don’t see more films set around a funeral home. The home here is what audiences would expect to see. They build a good story that takes a different angle with having the family accept the fact that ghosts live in part of the house. Because of that, there aren’t as many hauntings as usual, but the uneasy feeling is still there. The real excitement comes in the final act, which ends with one character’s story coming full circle in an odd way. With that, I give “The Funeral Home” 3 pools of blood!

 HorrO

More about this film at: 

http://promotehorror.com/2021/01/08/official-trailer-for-the-funeral-home/

THE NIGHT REVIEW

 

An Iranian couple living in the US become trapped inside a hotel when insidious events force them to face the secrets that have come between them, in a night that never ends.

Starring: Shahab Hosseini, Niousha Noor, and George Maguire

Directed by: Kourosh Ahari 

Written by: Kourosh Ahari and Milad Jarmooz

  “The Night” proves to be a bad time to check into a hotel. It’s going to be an extremely long night for Babak (Shahab Hosseini) and Neda (Niousha Noor), but before things go wrong they have a little fun. They’re at a friends house drinking and playing some games. It’s getting late and probably past their baby girl’s bedtime, so they decide to hit the road. Their friends offer them a room for the night, but Babak insists he can make it home with no problems.

  He seems to get a little lost on the way home before getting into a small accident. It forces them to take refuge for the rest of the night in a nearby hotel. The strange man at the front hints that the hotel is almost full, but has a suite for them. This is odd later on because the hotel appears rather empty once things go wrong. And yea, things start going really wrong once the couple tries to get a few hours of sleep.

  Starting from the moment they walk into the hotel something seems off. Is it the hotel that’s haunting them, or something more personal? Babak wakes and appears to be haunted by a woman while Neda wakes to a haunting of her own. Neda is haunted by hearing and seeing a young boy who apparently is looking for his mommy. Neither the woman or the boy produce any great jump scares, but they do keep things uneasy for the couple and the audience. One of best scenes is easily when a cop comes to check on them. 

  So while the audience might not jump out of their seats, they might be on the edge of them as the couple struggles to figure out what’s going on. The hotel provides a great setting to entrap the couple. It’s dark, and much more abandoned then they might have thought. Every time they hear something they think it’s another guests, but it’s more likely whatever is haunting them. Things also play out making it hard for them to just get up, and walk out like they want to do. And don’t forget that while all the madness is happening there is still a baby girl to look out for. 

  Babak and Neda wish the night would come and go, but unfortunately for them this night never seems to end. The couple will check into a hotel, but find it hard to check out like normal people. The hotel provides a great place for all of the hauntings without having to do anything out of the ordinary. While the audience might not be jumping out of their seats, they will find themselves invested in what’s happening to the couple. That’s because Shahab and Niousha, who might not be familiar names and faces for some, do a pretty good job bringing out true fear in their characters. The secret behind the hauntings might be the secret to the story’s success. With that, I give “The Night” 3 pools of blood.

  HorrO

More info about this film at: http://promotehorror.com/2021/01/07/new-trailer-poster-iranian-psychological-thriller-the-night-starring-shahab-hosseini-a-separation-jan-29/

PSYCHO GOREMAN REVIEW

After unearthing a gem that controls an evil monster looking to destroy the Universe, a young girl and her brother use it to make him do their bidding.

Starring: Matthew Ninaber, Nita-Josee Hanna, and Owen Myre

Directed and written by: Steven Kostanski

  “Psycho Goreman” doesn’t sound like someone you want to hangout with unless your name is Mimi! Before finding himself on Earth, Psycho Goreman, or PG (Matthew Ninaber) was nothing but a prisoner to his planet. Then one day he luckily found an amulet that gave him power to kill everyone who was holding him down, and many many more. No, his story isn’t about becoming a hero and freeing everyone, but more about becoming a killing machine.

  The leaders of several planets led by Pandora (Kristen MacCulloch) came together to banish PG, and save themselves for the time being. Sister and brother, Mimi (Nita-Josee Hanna) and Luke (Owen Myre), change those plans when they dig a hole in their backyard. Mimi thinks she just found a piece of jewelry, but soon enough finds out they dug up something else. When they find PG it seems they’ve met their doom, and PG couldn’t be happier to get rid of these two kids. Unfortunately for PG, Mimi has the amulet, and new found control of her very own killer alien!

  There is so much to love about this movie that it should be hard to find a place to begin. However, the fabulous performance by Nita is the perfect place to start with. Mimi is strong willed, and so bossy that even her parents are scared to tell her ‘no.’ On the other hand, she’s just another kid at heart wanting to play games, and be adventurous. Nita plays both sides of this personality to perfection as her character turns the most lethal killer in the galaxy into another one of her minions.

  In his world, PG is very much the same as Mimi, with minions on his side and everyone else running in fear. Too bad those who find themselves on the wrong side of PG usually end up dead. He doesn’t take long to show what his powers can do to easily dispose of humans, or turn them into an ooey gooey zombies. His mind is only on destroying everyone in his path, and yet he’s found himself at the mercy of a little girl.

  These two personalities come together to create some hilarious moments. Just imagine Mimi dressing up PG like she would a doll, taking him for a stroll through town, and teaching him her made up ridiculous game. Then him having moments to display his power blowing up random people, and turning people into mindless zombies. This brings in the SFX, which are practical and all done to please the audience. Just wait until the audience gets to see how PG gives his ultimate respect to his fallen rivals!

  And hidden in all the fun, and SFX is a story about family. A family where Mimi rules over all, especially her brother, and their mom who struggles to get her husband to do anything. Everyone is forced to take sides as the inevitable battle between Pandora and PG comes to a head. It’s a good battle, but also one the audience will expect to see with how the movie plays out. While that battle takes place the family uses the moment to work out some of their own family issues.

  “Psycho Goreman” starts off like a Star Wars movie, but quickly becomes a very 80’s like movie filled with its share of horror, SFX, and comedy. It’s a film that isn’t afraid to make fun of itself along the way, and push the bounds of ridiculousness. It all starts with two strong personalities that would never get along if it weren’t for an amulet giving control of one over the other. Nita nails her character, and puts on a brilliant performance. It wouldn’t be surprising to see her name come up in some future movies real soon. The audience will see a lot of work went into the practical SFX, and will love every time PG turns on someone. And just like many great 80’s films there’s a story about family to be found in the middle of the madness. With that said, I give it 5 pools of blood, and hope that there is a sequel one day if PG hasn’t destroyed the world yet!

  

 HorrO

More about this film at the link below:

http://promotehorror.com/2020/12/10/pg-psycho-goreman-by-steven-kostanski-releasing-january-22/

RENT-A-PAL REVIEW

Set in 1990, a lonely bachelor named David searches for an escape from the day-to-day drudgery of caring for his aging mother. While seeking a partner through a video dating service, he discovers a strange VHS tape called Rent-A-Pal. Hosted by the charming and charismatic Andy, the tape offers him much-needed company, compassion, and friendship. But, Andy’s friendship comes at a cost, and David desperately struggles to afford the price of admission.

Starring: Wil Wheaton, Brian Landis Folkins, and Amy Rutledge

Directed and written by: Jon Stevenson

Check out the video below and find out how many pools of blood it received.

REDWOOD MASSACRE: ANNIHILATION REVIEW

 

The hunters become the hunted after a stranger obsessed with the Redwood Farm murders convinces bereaved family members to venture into the wilderness in hope of proving the existence of the notorious burlap masked maniac.

Starring: Danielle Harris, Damien Puckler, and Gary Kasper

Directed and written by: David Ryan Keith

Check out the video below and find out how many pools of blood it received.

THE HEKS REVIEW

 

A grieving British girl unravels her murdered mother’s secrets connected to a South African witch doctor’s curse.

Starring: Coco Lloyd, Mari Molefe van Heerden, and Mary-Anne Barlow

Directed and written by: Reine Swart

  “The Heks” might be on me if this movie doesn’t receive enough pools of blood! Dilanne (Coco Lloyd) is doing what many of us do these days. She's talking to her mom on a video chat when someone appears, and murders her mother. Dilanne is upset, and wants answers to why this happened. She can’t wait, and flies home to South Africa to start an investigation of her own.

  Usually this would be a good time to get reacquainted with family and friends, but Dilanne didn’t come home for a visit. She digs into her mom’s things looking for clues to why she was killed. Things get interesting when she finds an unusual looking mask. Throw in a witch doctor and things get cooking.

  At times it might seem a little slow when Dilanne is investigating, but the movie keeps the audience on its toes with some scares. Actually it does a pretty job with the scares coming in nightmares, and hallucinations. Sometimes its creepy, and other times it’s with the intent to scare. Definitely be on alert because they will be trying the best to surprise the audience, and not every scare is saved for Dilanne.

  Audiences might think they know this story, but being in South Africa gives it a refreshing feel. They construct a story where the audience will have to pick up on some different folklore. Obviously the creepy looking masks are a starting point, and the music during some scares echoes that. They also create a mysterious atmosphere around Dilanne that never leaves her upon her arrival. Oh, and don't forget the witch doctor.

  “The Heks” seems like a familiar story, but has its own feeling to it. It starts with being in South Africa, and following some folklore that might be new to some audiences. If the audience gets a little lost in Dilanne’s investigation that’s alright because the scares are headed their way. There’s a good mix of jump scares, and plain old creepy moments to keep them on edge. It all comes down to a very wild ending. With that said, please don’t put a curse on me if I give it 3 pools of blood.

  

 HorrO

More about this film at:

http://promotehorror.com/2020/12/24/the-hex-film-premiered-this-december/

WHERE THE SCARY THINGS ARE EPISODE 77: PSYCHO GOREMAN

 

Where The Scary Things Are Episode 77: PSYCHO GOREMAN with STEVEN KOSTANSKI and NITA-JOSEE HANNA

We sit down with a returning guest, Director Steven Kostanski and a star in the making, Nita-Josee Hanna to talk about their new film PSYCHO GOREMAN.  This film is the perfect way to kick off 2021. One of the most entertaining films we have reviewed on the show.

WhereTheScaryThingsAre.com

#Apple : apple.co/3s5w340

#Spotify: spoti.fi/3s5vFT6

#YouTube: bit.ly/2Lle9sY

MY DEAD ONES REVIEW

 

Behind the looks of a shy film student, David hides an obscure past that is about to be revealed.

Starring: Nicolas Prattes, Neusa Maria Faro, and Andre Hendges

Directed by: Diego Freitas

Written by: Diego Fretias and Gustavo Rosseb

  “My Dead Ones” seems like a curious name for a film, but makes a lot more sense once this one ends. David (Nicolas Prattes) might seem a little odd at first, but that’s just because he’s a little shy. He has some friends, but he’s more interested in his films. It appears he likes to be filming from the shadows, and capturing his subjects in their natural environment. At least that what happens at first.

  With his awkwardness, he will draw the audience on his side early. They will feel sorry for him when they see him get picked on at school, and have his camera damaged on purpose. However, as the audience gets to spend more time with David, they’re going to realize there is nothing to feel sorry for. Some think the quiet ones sometimes become the dangerous ones, and David lives up to that.

  If the audience likes a film about how someone becomes a serial killer than this might be a film for them. It follows David as he just seems to be interested in filming different people. However, each person he begins following and filming becomes a potential victim of his. It starts kind of surprisingly with an elderly lady, who might have had issues of her own. While that seems like a little bit of a random kill to start with, it will soon enough make more sense as the story goes on.

  David goes from a shy young man to a daring stalker and killer. He spends more time getting close to his victims before going for the kill. In one of the more exciting kills, he goes after a father and daughter. He seems to get out some anger or frustration in this kill. Also, he’s sure to record the kills, and load them on the internet. He doesn’t seem overly concerned with police investigating these murders because he has a growing confidence as the movie goes on. 

  On the surface this might be what audiences expect from a serial killer. However there’s something else going on here, and a bigger reason to why he’s killing certain people. No spoilers here, but it definitely adds an intriguing angle to his story. It does get a little confusing towards the end, as his reality seems to be very blurred. However, he still manages one more surprise before this one ends.

  The original title for this movie was “David’s Secret.” He definitely has a big secret, and maybe even a few smaller ones connected to that secret. However, the title “My Dead Ones” makes this seem a little more interesting. Once the audience gets to know David, and see what he’s up to it will all make more sense. Like most serial killers, they will see what’s going on in his twisted head. It gets a little crazy towards the end, but be ready for another good surprise or two. If you like movies that follow serial killers, then this new Brazilian film might be for you. With that, I give it 3 pools of blood.

  HorrO

13 SLAYS TILL X-MAS REVIEW

On December 24th, five seemingly random men are invited to a dive bar by a myserteous e-mail. They decide to pass the time by resurrecting the old tradition of telling scary stories on Christmas Eve. 

Starring: Jessica Anderson, Christopher Bower, and Cassondra Brian

Stories directed by: Brittany Blanton, Sean Blevins, Jed Brian, Shawn Burkett, William Capps, Alex Clark, John Hale III, Blair Hoyle, Robert Kern III, Drew Marvick, P.J. Starks, John Mason, and Eric Huskisson

Written by: John Mason and P.J. Starks

  “13 Slays Till X-Mas” comes down the chimney with 13 short horror Christmas films for your holiday fun! Five guys, including a cop, priest, and guy dressed as Santa, are spending their Christmas eve at a bar of all places. Apparently they’re there because of an email, and not because they enjoy each other’s company. Instead of continuing the trash talking to each other all night long they decide to tell some Christmas stories with a horror twist to them. Obviously this means that horror fans are set up for an anthology of horror. 

  With so many short films means there will probably be some to like more than others. So here are a few that stood out to me. One of the priest’s stories involves a father who apparently made a deal with something evil. That evil has now come to collect leaving a very creepy ending. The cop has an interesting story that’s familiar to another popular Christmas tale. In this story, a person is shown visions of his past, present, and future that ends in a very sad fashion.

  Santa has a pair of good stories starting with two guys breaking into a house. They aren’t there to steal gifts, but instead want to steal a life. Unfortunately things don’t turn out the way they expect. There’s a good touch of humor here, but ends very deadly. Many might not associate clowns with Christmas, but this anthology has a clown that no one will be laughing at. He’s certainly going to be his best to entertain this boy’s lying father!

  This isn’t the only story with kids in it. Another tale features a mean brother teasing his younger sister about writing to Santa. He tries to scare his sister, but it doesn’t go as planned. Lets just say both siblings get what they asked for. In one of the seemingly longer and more shocking stories, the bartender opens with a story about a cop on the scene of a prisoner escape. Guards and fellow officers are down as she looks for the prisoner. There’s a twist to this story with much more to come. It all ends with another surprise, and a big bang!

  Hopefully that didn’t spoil any of the shorts, and as for the main story it starts to come to an end when a mystery woman comes into the bar. She has a final story to tell that everyone in the bar will what to hear. Overall there’s a good mix of stories here. Some may seem a little familiar with a new attempt to change the story, while others have some fun new twists audiences won’t see coming. Some are about keeping things dark and myserteous, while others bring the blood and guts. Incorporating Christmas in the tales is part of the challenge, and what makes them special. Because they did a solid job of this, I’m going to gift wrap 3 pools of blood for “13 Slays Till X-Mas.” 

  

 HorrO

More about this film at:

http://promotehorror.com/2020/12/18/13-slays-till-x-mas-blu-ray-release/

WHERE THE SCARY THINGS ARE EPISODE 76: THE 2020 GOLD GOAT AWARDS

 

In this Episode we hand out our Gold Goats to the movies we loved this year. We give out awards to Best Film, Best Director, Best Actor and Actress, Best Kill, Scariest Movie, Best Effects, and a couple other surprises like Ken taking on the Deathly 13. Support the show!

Listen Here, or watch below:

WhereTheScaryThingsAre.com

Apple: apple.co/3aYAE1O

Spotify: spoti.fi/34WYCXc

BLACK WATER: ABYSS REVIEW

Five friends exploring a remote cave system in Northern Australia find themselves threatened by a hungry crocodile.

Starring: Jessica McNamee, Luke Mitchell, and Amali Golden

Directed by: Andrew Traucki

Written by: John Ridley and Sarah Smith

Check out the video below and find out how many pools of blood it received.

SHOCK DOC: DISCOVERY+ ORIGINAL- "AMITYVILLE HORROR HOUSE" REVIEW

 

“AMITYVILLE HORROR HOUSE”

Launching: Monday, January 4, 2021 on discovery+

In 1977, the book, “The Amityville Horror,” was published and caused a sensation. The subsequent 1979 film adaptation was a surprise box office hit. Today, it is the quintessential American horror story based on true events – family moves into their dream house in an all-American town and experiences the most terrifying demonic haunting imaginable. Demon possession, demon attacks, a portal to hell – it was a situation so dire, even the church couldn’t help them. Through archival footage and re-creations, our film presents the harrowing true story of Ronald DeFeo, who murdering his entire family in the Amityville house, and the 28 days the Lutz family lived there. A rare, archival interview with George Lutz, describing the final, terrifying night in the Amityville house, is revealed for the first time.

  There’s an argument to be made whether kicking off a new streaming service with an “Amityville” special is a good idea. Either it will intrigue some viewers enough to come back for more episodes like this, or it will scare them away forever! Alright, that might be a little dramatic but this documentary is serious stuff. Horror fans are familiar with “The Amityville Horror” movie, and the many versions of it that followed. However, how many have taken the time to really hear about the story that started it all in the infamous house?

  This documentary begins with the family that lived in the house prior to the Lutz family. The DeFeo family enjoyed their new home until things went tragically wrong. There’s a brief discussion about the family before the night Ronald DeFeo murdered his family. Even as a horror fan it’s hard to imagine someone doing something so extreme for no reason. Then again you might be one of the people who believe a demon lurking in the house made him do it.

  It’s hard to think anyone would agree to live in a house after that, but the Lutz family took the chance. Some of this part of the story might be familiar if you’ve seen the movie, or read the books on the house. The documentary takes the audience through the 28 days the family spent in the house before leaving. It seems like the evil took interest in Mr. Lutz the most, and it was up to him to protect his family. It gets real interesting once the Warrens are called to investigate the house. The audience gets to hear about their investigation, and what they thought about the house. More investigators come to the house all looking for evidence, and giving their opinion. One offers an opinion similar to the plot in another famous horror movie.

  Another interesting part of the doc is that the audience gets to hear part of an interview with Mr. Lutz. They get to hear his side of story on things, and even some mistakes they made after leaving. Regardless, they made the right decision in leaving. As horror fans we always say, “just leave,” and they did just that. The audience gets to hear and see about that escape, and the way they left really points to there being something they were definitely running from.

  Overall, this is a very good documentary, and definitely one to see if you’ve ever wondered about the truth behind the movie. It will answer some questions, but certainly give the audience a lot to think about. It starts with the DeFeo family, but who was in the house before? What was in the house…a ghost, a demon, multiple haunting spirits? That is one question they leave the audience to decide for themselves. It seems they make it clear the family thought something was there, but do you? It will be your chance to decide when it releases on discovery+! 

  

  HorrO

More info about this film at: http://promotehorror.com/2020/12/28/discovery-launching-its-new-shock-docs-special-amityville-horror-house-on-monday-january-4/

BLACK PUMPKIN REVIEW

 

On October 31st, two preteens in a small town accidentally awaken an evil that has lain dormant for decades. They are forced to survive through a terrifying Halloween night of cat-and-mouse, from the monster known as “Bloody Bobby.”

Starring: Alix Lane, Matt Rife, and Lily Keene

Directed and written by: Ryan McGonagle

Check out the video below and find out how many pools of blood it received.